How to pose when you hate being photographed

By Mariya Harley · London · updated August 2026

'Just be natural' is the worst instruction in photography

It asks you to perform the absence of performance. If a photographer says it, ask instead for something concrete: where to put your weight, where to look, what to do with your hands. Specific instructions produce natural frames; the instruction to be natural does not.

Build up to eye contact

Start with your back to the camera, or in profile, or looking down. Detail frames — hands, the line of a shoulder — require nothing of your face and let you settle. By the time the lens wants your eyes, the first ten minutes of self-consciousness have passed.

Give yourself a task

Walk somewhere and back. Put a coat on. Hold a coffee. Sit down mid-sentence. People who dislike being photographed almost always photograph well the moment they are doing something rather than being looked at.

Control the room

Ask for a small set: photographer only, no assistant, nobody waiting. Choose a location you know rather than a studio if that helps. Say all of this when you book, not on the day — a photographer who knows in advance will run the session differently.

Do not look at the back of the camera

Reviewing frames mid-session makes almost everyone worse for the next twenty minutes, because you start managing your face. Shoot a full sequence first and look afterwards — ideally the next day, when you are judging the pictures rather than the experience.

The honest part

You may still not enjoy it, and plenty of people never do. The test of a session is not whether it was fun; it is whether you can use the photographs afterwards.